Soap Bars

Notes: Ozone, Sea Salt, Eucalyptus, Sandalwood, Dark Musk Suspect Description: Apprehended aboard “The Reel Booty” after downloading and distributing thousands of illicit copies of the latest movies. Suspect has several defining features - wooden peg leg, hook for right hand, and an eye patch. For anyone who loves a fresh ocean scent, and a gift for IP and copyright lawyers and sailors. Hand-poured in small batches, this natural moisturizing soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Safe for sensitive skin - full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Blood Orange, Grapefruit, Mandarin Suspect Description: Arrested following an investigation into activities deemed contrary to national interests. Suspect was surprised to learn that attempting to overthrow the government is an act of Treason. For anyone who loves bright citrus, and a gift for lawyers, history buffs, political junkies and anyone who works in government. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Lavender, Lemon, Eucalyptus, Cedar Suspect Description: Suspect taken into custody after reportedly turning a quiet evening into an unsolicited street performance. Nearby officers arrived during the first act, resulting in an early curtain call. For anyone who loves lavender, and a calming gift for patrol officers, dispatchers and lawyers who could use a quieter evening. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Apple, Fir, Juniper, Cedar, Moss, Ozone, Iced Gingersnap Suspect Description: Officers found suspect behind an old storefront, muttering unintelligible phrases over a cauldron - something about toil and trouble. For anyone who loves crisp apple and evergreen, and a witchy fall and Halloween gift for true crime fans and anyone who believes in a little magic. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Fruit Loops (Lemon, Cake, and other fruits) Suspect Description: Neighbors describe the suspect as quiet, except for the late-night sound of power tools and classical music. His hobby list reportedly includes "collecting souvenirs" and smiling a little too fondly when asked about them. For anyone who loves a sweet, fruity cereal scent, and a gift for true crime podcast fans, homicide detectives and lawyers with a dark sense of humor. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Vanilla, Amber, Jasmine, Patchouli, Musk, Coconut Suspect Description: Male, mid-40s, caught creeping home at dawn with lipstick on his collar and a whiff of perfume no husband should be wearing. Currently starring in a fault-based divorce. For anyone who loves a warm jasmine, amber and vanilla scent, and a cheeky gift for divorce attorneys, family-law teams and true crime fans. Also a fun Valentine's Day or date-night gift. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Sage, Orange, Lavender, Amber, Oakmoss Suspect Description: Suspect was found near the loading docks carrying a large amount of unreported cargo. After attempting to explain he was "just the delivery guy", officers were unconvinced and completed the arrest without incident. For anyone who loves an herbal, earthy scent, and a gift for customs and federal agents, officers and attorneys. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Peppermint, Vanilla, Cream Suspect Description: Defendant argued charges should be dropped because all goods in question were intended as gifts. In the spirit of the holidays, the judge only sentenced her to community service. For anyone who loves peppermint, and a holiday gift for loss-prevention teams, police officers and lawyers. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Mulled Cider (Apples, Oranges, Berries, Cloves, Vanilla, Cinnamon) Suspect Description: Male, mid-30s, armed only with misplaced confidence and a poor grasp of public boundaries. Witnesses noted his commitment to "full disclosure" was excessive. For anyone who loves mulled cider, and a funny fall gift for lawyers and police officers. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Fresh Linen, Citrus, Clean Cotton Suspect Description: Suspect was apprehended after a quiet trail of scrubbed ledgers led investigators to their door. He insists it was simple bookkeeping, but the numbers told a cleaner story than truth ever could. For anyone who loves the smell of fresh laundry, and a funny gift for accountants, bankers, compliance teams and financial-crimes prosecutors. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Cardamom, Orange Peel, Musk, Amber, Palm, Sea Salt Suspect Description: Defendant phoned the clerk at 8:55 a.m. to say they were “five minutes away.” That was in March. For anyone who loves a warm, sun-soaked beach scent, and a gift for defense attorneys, court clerks, bailiffs and bail bondsmen. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Rose, Magnolia, Bergamot, Jasmine, Mahogany, Bamboo Suspect Description: Suspect can neither confirm nor deny being present at the scene, owning the briefcase handcuffed to their wrist, or having a name. Officers noted when asked to remove their glasses, their nose and mustache came off as well. For anyone who loves a fresh rose and jasmine floral, and a gift for federal agents, intelligence analysts, national security lawyers and spy-novel fans. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Snickerdoodle (Cinnamon, Butter, Vanilla, Sugar, Honey, Cream) Suspect Description: Caught red-handed, suspect explained the crowbar was his "emotional support tool" and insisted he was only breaking in because Zillow said the house was "open concept." For anyone who loves the smell of fresh-baked snickerdoodles, and a gift for police officers, criminal defense attorneys and new homeowners with a sense of humor. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Cypress, Lemon Peel, Evergreen, Cedar, Fir, Moss, Amber Suspect Description: Suspect was found building a treehouse on land he does not own, in a tree he does not own, with lumber he would prefer not to discuss. For anyone who loves the smell of an evergreen forest, and a gift for property lawyers and hikers. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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Notes: Nag Champa Incense Suspect Description: Suspect was found behind the local bowling alley wearing a bathrobe, slippers, and dark glasses. Arrested shortly after officers paid a visit and were offered free samples. For anyone who loves classic Nag Champa incense, and a gift for defense attorneys and narcotics officers. Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural oatmeal and restorative shea butter, this soap invites you to indulge in a little mischief. Contains suspended oatmeal that exfoliates the skin plus the skin-loving properties of shea butter. Full ingredient list of soap base can be found here: LINK

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