Unauthorized Practice of Medicine

Coffee, caramel, vanilla, milk, and sugar make this the only prescription you'll actually want to fill. No license required.

3 products

  • Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Scented Candle Small | Squat Jelly Jar | 3 oz - Presumed Innoscent Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Scented Candle Small | Squat Jelly Jar | 3 oz - Presumed Innoscent

    Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Scented Candle

    Notes: Coffee, Caramel, Vanilla, Milk, Sugar  Suspect Description: Suspect was caught offering “miracle surgeries” in a strip mall, where anesthesia was replaced with numbing cream from the dollar store. Patients grew suspicious when post-op advice included “just walk it off.” Hand-poured in small batches from natural wax, it offers a clean, long-lasting burn that invites you to indulge in a little mischief. 

    $8.00 - $24.00

  • Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Room Spray 8 oz - Presumed Innoscent Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Room Spray 8 oz - Presumed Innoscent

    Unauthorized Practice of Medicine Room Spray

    Notes: Coffee, Caramel, Vanilla, Sugar Suspect Description: Suspect was caught offering “miracle surgeries” in a strip mall, where anesthesia was replaced with numbing cream from the dollar store. Patients grew suspicious when post-op advice included “just walk it off.”  Hand-poured in small batches from a blend of natural, biodegradable ingredients, this room spray invites you to freshen up your space and indulge in a little mischief.

    $8.00 - $14.00

  • Unauthorized Practice of Medicine 6pc Wax Melt - Presumed Innoscent Unauthorized Practice of Medicine 6pc Wax Melt - Presumed Innoscent

    Unauthorized Practice of Medicine 6pc Wax Melt

    Notes: Coffee, Caramel, Vanilla, Milk, Sugar  Suspect Description: Suspect was caught offering “miracle surgeries” in a strip mall, where anesthesia was replaced with numbing cream from the dollar store. Patients grew suspicious when post-op advice included “just walk it off.”  Hand-made in Falls Church, Virginia using a 100% natural all soy wax blend, premium fragrance oils and dyes. 100% Vegan, Phthalate Free, Toxin Free, and Paraben Free, these criminal melts offering a clean, long-lasting, flameless experience that invites you to indulge in a little mischief. These wax melts are the perfect way to enjoy your favorite criminal fragrance without a flame! Each wax melt cube provides 15-20 hours of fragrance before it begins to fade depending on the type of wax warmer used. Wax warmer required for use.

    $5.00

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